The iron extrovert makes an apology

Like so many 25 year old women, I feel like I've had my share of heart-breaks. But in hindsight, I realize that I am just the kind of person who will inevitabley feel brokenhearted, simply because my heart is built with so much sensitivity in it. It is a fruit on the vine, so ready to contribute something sweet to the world that I can bruise at the slightest or gentlest touch. A heart that eager to give isn't always good for people, and i've done my share of hurting- so eager to be significant to people that I invest more than I can keep up with. I dive deeper than my lungs can sustain and invite more than I can possibly honor.Maybe I put my identity in being a person who could be everything to everyone. Maybe it came from pride. I don't mean to do it, and the curiosity and care is genuine. But I am just me. There is a list of people in my head that I've hurt this way. People I let down when I wasn't as able as I thought I was. The iron extravert: the bearer of a thousand weights, a thousand stories, and no muscle to back up the dillusional feeling of might. How did the list get so long? Sometimes, out of nowhere, I feel a massive weight of regret and responsability for broken relationships and friendships in my life. And all I can really do is apologize. I'm sorry to anyone I've hurt by acting as the iron extravert. I am weaker than my will. More ambitious than I am able. I'm learing. I'm learning when to let people stay a bit unknown. And I'm sorry to those I hurt in learning this.